For quite some time I've suffered feelings of worthlessness, low self esteem and not much in the way of self confidence. I struggle with believing in myself. It would be so nice to be able to remove some of the doubts that I have about myself, maybe change some of the things that are stopping me from making the most out of my life. I would much rather.... and find it much easier to give priority to other peoples needs and happiness.
Both my parents always instilled goodness in me. They always encouraged me and did their very best to lead me down the right path. I've always been a kind of quiet, shy person and never wanted to be put in the spotlight. I've always been more of a follower than a leader. Often times believing most anything someone would tell me. I guess I'm also a bit gullible. I've always had a tendancy to take things that were said to or about me to heart. Some of the things, most of the bad.... I have a difficult time letting go of. People, both children and adults can be so mean with their words. I beat myself up alot over things that have hurt me and wish that I could just let it go.
I've never been one to brag or be selfish or conceited because it never seemed like the right thing to do. Over time I suppose I've come to not like myself and believe that I don't deserve happiness in my life. Not such a good thing because my self esteem has suffered and my self worth has been forgotten. Now, I'm beginning to realize that first and foremost I need to learn to love, value, respect and take care of myself. Hopefully this will make me more responsible and more at peace with myself so that I can love and help others to the very best of my ability.
So I'm on a hunt... searching for that which I lost sight of, my worth, confidence and innate value. I know it's there, I just need to recover it. Wish me luck.
Peace & be well,
